Learning How to Let Go of Your Life

This title might sound suicidal, but this is not my intention. When you look at your life as the consciousness that keeps you alive and allows you to be more active, letting go of your life is freeing your consciousness. You are freeing it from your thoughts and conditioning. This allows you to be conscious of powerful inner resources and develop a deep spiritual connection. This goes against the way most people live their life.

We have been conditioned to be very conscious of the way we think. Our conditioning is so strong that our consciousness is trapped in our thinking mind. Basically, this is another way of defining attachments. When your consciousness is connected to a thought, you are unable to connect to your deeper inner wisdom. On almost every spiritual path, you are encouraged to let go of your attachments, which allows consciousness to enter a spiritual realm.

I want to propose to you that this can naturally happen in every breath. When we learn how to breathe beyond our thinking mind, our in-breath is a way of letting go of the thoughts that define our life. This in-breath can create a habit that frees us from our thinking mind every time we breathe. Then, on our out-breath, our consciousness returns to our thinking mind with a clear perspective.

To the ego that naturally fears death and is what we identify with, this traps us in our thinking mind. For most people, their thinking mind serves them and makes them more efficient in this world. But, when a person aspires to an important goal, that beyond-thought reality is the home of powerful inner resources that they need. For instance, if you struggle with a health crisis, breathing into this depth is how you can become an active participant as a partner with your doctor. Not only do you activate your healing powers, you remove anxious thinking that limits your ability to heal.

If you want to express love to someone who is important to you, the ability to breathe beyond thoughts allows your heart’s expression to be pure. We limit our love by the way we think and were conditioned. If you had the power to transport consciousness to the silence beyond your thoughts, your love would be free from any limitations. Of course, this happens by a habit which can happen to most people naturally. But, for those whose love is limited by their thoughts and conditioning, they may need to put conscious effort into making this happen.

Another aspect of our life that this breath can serve is our work. When we hold onto our thoughts, we block creativity and our openness to new ideas. Creativity is an important part of work and can subconsciously be limited by the habits we create. Developing the habit of conscious breathing, where we let go of our thinking mind, has the ability to makes us more conscious on our job.

Focusing on breathing may sound insignificant, but it can add quality to every aspect of your life if done consciously.  I suggest that you take time and develop the habit of letting go of your thoughts. This can happen by practicing breathing into silence every night before you go to sleep and every morning when you wake up. This will allow you an instant escape from anxious thinking and, possibly, develop this habit in every breath.

In a health crisis, you need to learn how to let go, so that powerful inner resources can assist you. In my book, A Healthy Way to be Sick, you learn to apply this in a health crisis. In my book, The End: A Creative Approach to Death, you apply this same perspective to your final days, as you approach death.


© 2015 Marc Lerner

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THE WHOLE BRAIN

Once we understand how the brain works, we can use it to manifest wisdom. We travel through life in three main states of consciousness. The first stage I call “Innocent.” As young children, we do not know right from wrong–we are innocent. Older, we learn to distinguish between right and wrong and we develop the second stage, which I call the “Doer.”

 

The “Doer” performs actions controlled by the conscious mind, doing right and avoiding wrong and the punishment wrong actions bring. The “Doer” is focused on thoughts within the mind. This is a natural and very important learning stage, but many of us get stuck in this stage and do not go on to the next.

 

I call the final stage the “Receiver.”  In this stage, we receive from our own wisdom and accept its lessons with real openness. Many who are aware of the difference between these stages feel that it is almost an “either/or” situation; either one performs actions as the Doer, or he meditates and goes deep within and receives deeper experiences. But instead of either/or, both states of mind can exist simultaneously. We can perform actions and attain this depth by learning how to “be,” as we simply live our lives.

 

In the healing process, we need to use our whole brain. We need to do things that are right, like eating healthy foods and taking the correct medicine. We need to be receptive and listen to the Wisdom of our Body. Sometimes, a person does not learn to use their whole brain until they face a crisis, like a chronic illness.

 

When I began working with the combat veterans, they often thought I was “against” thinking. They told me that when they were in combat they had to think. My response to this was that thinking itself is not bad.  My own work obviously involves a lot of thinking. But thinking can take place in the Doer stage of consciousness, or we can learn to be receptive and receive thoughts from the deeper wisdom of being.

 

“Receptive thinking” is most likely the type of thinking that took place in a combat situation for the veterans. In those situations they were, by necessity, so connected to life that their thoughts had to come from a higher consciousness.

 

If we were to step back for a moment, we would see that the brain is the creator of every experience we have. Most of us  are conditioned to look first to external things for the experiences we want.  This happens automatically, but the external world can only activate the brain to create the desired experience. It is the brain itself that creates the experience. We can learn to use our brains to create experiences we want.

 

Once we enter the Receptive stage, we can learn a great deal from inner wisdom. The better we understand how the brain works, the easier it is to use it. Dr. Paul MacLean, a brain researcher, shows us that the brain is made of three main parts.   He calls the first part of the brain, the “Reptilian” brain. This part of the brain operates the bodily functions and is concerned with survival.

 

The next part of the brain is called the “Mammalian” brain. This is our emotional center. The third part of the brain, which is found in more evolved mammals, is called the “New” brain. The New brain is made up of two hemispheres. The Left hemisphere stores our thinking and speaking abilities. The Right hemisphere is the home of our creative and spatial awareness, as well as our connection to the Mammalian and Reptilian brains.

 

The New brain is the tool we use to adapt to society.  While these two hemispheres operate independently, they are both involved in many of the things we do.  When we speak, the Left hemisphere deals with the linear process of thinking and speaking, while the Right hemisphere can be involved with spatial awareness and creativity.  Each part of the brain is unique, but they cannot be separated into definite categories.  The fact that they work together means that analyzing the brain does not produce a “black and white” picture; rather, these two hemispheres work together.

 

In healing, we need to use the whole brain. The Left hemisphere is used to become a partner with your doctor. The Right hemisphere is a more receptive mind, which can creatively deal with uncomfortable situations. This part of the brain is connected to the Mammalian brain, which deals with emotions.

Many illnesses are affected by suppressing emotion. This makes the Mammalian brain ineffective and cuts down the connection to the Reptilian brain, which deals with the body’s functions. In a healthy brain, there is a natural flow between the New brain and the Reptilian brain and back again. This is where you communicate to your body and the Wisdom of the Body communicates to you.

 

Obviously, we do not think this way under normal conditions. When we face a challenge, like a serious illness, we have to understand this flow. It is easy to block the flow in our everyday life, simply by unconscious communications to the body and sensitivity to what the body gives back. Using the whole brain is essential in a health crisis, but it is also needed to live a quality life.

The two books I have written that will further explain this article are A Healthy Way to be Sick and The Positive Self: Change Your Self-Image and You Change Your Life. (Amazon/Kindle)

How to Share with Others When You Are Chronically Ill or Disabled

  

When people greet you with, “Hi, how are you?” most of the time they do not expect you to answer the question. When you are dealing with a chronic illness, that question can be very annoying. A person in a health struggle has to be very aware of who they are speaking to and not share with people who cannot consciously deal with it. This may seem like a small thing, but sometimes the little changes you make in your mind can completely change your perspective.

How you share sets the tone of how you relate to your illness. If your sharing is casual, giving pat answers only, your focus on your illness becomes limited. If your sharing is panicky, expressing fear, your focus will be scattered.  The ideal focus is to allow the interest of who you are talking to, to pull your answers out. This is a natural phenomenon; when you talk to someone who is truly interested, there is a flow and sharing seems to be easier. When you talk to someone with is not truly interested or uncomfortable relating to you, your sharing is awkward and does not seem to flow. So, be conscious of who you share with because it sets the tone for how you communicate about your illness.

It is important to be conscious of what you are sharing, because it is very easy to fall into unconscious, manipulative actions. For example, when a child does not want to go to school, they will often say, “I don’t feel good.” This is something children might do to get out of going to school, but that behavior can spill into other areas of your life. For example, a chronically ill person might use their illness to get out of something they do not want to do. The alternative is just to be truthful and share without any ulterior motives.

When some people have had a chronic illness for a long time, it is not uncommon for them not to want to talk about it.  They may have explained it over and over and there may be no hope for improvement in the future.  This type of sharing can create a dangerous habit, where they use avoidance and it becomes a natural response.

Often, people will try to serve you by offering you the newest ‘magic cure.’ Even though they are well-meaning, I suggest that you be open to everything, but check everything with your doctor.  It is important to have an objective perspective, where wishful thinking does not lead you down unscientific paths.

If you share with someone in an unconscious way (for instance, complaining and self-pity), you may be setting up thought patterns that do not serve you.  The ideal state of mind for a person in a health struggle is to be conscious in the moment, connected to inner resources and accepting the responsibility that this is your body. This does not depend on who you talk to.

Go to Amazon/Kindle.com to purchase A Healthy Way to be Sick, In this book, you will become an empowered patient. You will talk with the confidence that, even though you are sick, you are in control. In the book, The Positive Self: Change Your Self-Image and You Change Your Life, you develop this perspective in your entire life. The intensity of a chronic illness has the ability to make you dig deep to find resources and share from an empowered perspective.

© 2015 Marc Lerner

How to Reduce Hospital Re-admissions Through Patient Participation

We have been brought up in a society that teaches us to rely on doctors, because they know the scientific approach to health. Doctors have gone to school for a long, intense education, but patients have not been taught how to be active and conscious patients.   I want to propose that the high recidivism rate of hospital admissions has a lot to do with not empowering patient participation.

When you look at the new health care law, it requires hospitals to reduce their readmissions of discharged patients. According to an article in the October, 2011, American Medical News, “Hospitals make almost no headway in cutting readmissions.” Researchers affiliated with Dartmouth Institute’s Atlas of Health Care examined the records of all 10.7 million Medicare patient hospital discharges from July 1, 2003 to June 30, 2009 and found little progress. They concluded, “Irrespective of the cause, unnecessary hospital readmissions lead to more tests and treatments, more time away from home and family, and higher health care costs.”

Along with its report, Dartmouth released a tip sheet for patients when leaving the hospital. The guide advises patients to ask for post-discharge planning help while still in the hospital and write a plan that captures elements such as expected discharge date, scheduled follow-up appointments, medication list, needed medical equipment and how to respond to anticipated symptoms.

Too often, when we look at empowering patient participation, we look at what the patient has to do to stay out of the hospital. I believe we need to focus on how a patient actively participates. We can do this by teaching practical life skills, like developing a positive self-image, self-trust and a way of consciously connecting to inner resources.

When a person has a positive self-image, they feel more worthy of healing. A person with a negative self-image too often has sub-conscious sabotaging programs that limit the healing process. Every time we think, our thoughts are directed to our self-image. If we have a positive self-image, we get positive responses. A negative self-image too often gives limiting responses.

In the Journal of the American Medical Association, it stated that the attitude a patient walks into the doctor’s office with determines receptivity of the doctor’s treatment. A positive self-image has the ability to better receive the doctor’s treatments.

Another important life skill that needs to be developed to reduce recidivism is self-trust. If a patient trusts themself, they will be more able to tap inner resources to be an active partner with their doctor.  Without self-trust, a patient will naturally look outside to solve their problems. In the case of poor health, the hospital would be a normal place to go.

When a patient trusts themself, their experience sends them a clear and powerful message. When they share that with the doctor, that partnership becomes more effective.  This eliminates one-way communication from doctor to patient. The optimal communication between doctor and patient is where the patient can accurately articulate their problem and the doctor responds with his medical knowledge. In a conscious partnership, if the patient does not agree or has questions, they are more likely to confidently speak up.

A third important life skill is conscious breathing. We become more aware of what our breath breathes into; it is like our breath gives life to what we breathe into. If we breathe into anxious thoughts, we will give life to a limiting part of us. If we could breathe into the silence beyond our thoughts, we could give life to what I call ‘The Wisdom of the Body.’ This is where inner resources are found to make the patient’s role more powerful. When the patient’s inner resources partner with the doctor’s treatments, there are better healing results.

My book, “A Healthy Way to Be Sick,” helps you to be aware and conscious during a hospital stay. In the book, you develop several life skills that help you tap inner resources to become an active patient, instead of a victim.

© 2015 Marc Lerner

   Preparing For a Conscious End of Life Process

Over 90% of deaths are preceded by an illness. After first diagnosis of a serious illness, but when death is not yet a threat, you can develop habits to make that time in your life have quality. Living a quality life to your final breath is something we all can do if we consciously prepare to do that. It isn’t the easiest thing to do, but all it takes is to live your life in the moment.

That means you have no unfinished business in your mind. Your relationships with the important people in your life are complete. Your hopes and dreams can feel fulfilled and you comfortably can rest in the moment. Otherwise, you are stuck in your mind, which make you unable to receive what comes next. That would give you time to consciously say goodbye to those you love and be in a place to receive their goodbyes.

Hello, my name is Marc Lerner and I have been seriously dealing with approaching death for the last year. Let me share with you the process that I am going through to help you in your preparation for your death.

This is a difficult subject to talk about because it makes most people feel uncomfortable. Once you are truly prepared to die, you don’t have to talk about it. To get ready though, you have to think and talk about it. There are three stages in this preparation; 1) once you receive the diagnosis 2) dealing with your illness and 3) approaching death.

How you receive the news sets the tone of how you will deal with the first stage of this process. I wrote a book called The Positive Self, Change Your Self Image and You Change Your Life. You might feel this is not the time to deal with personal growth, but the fact is you are entering a new significant stage. This is the last time you have to consciously deal with how to meet challenges, like chronic illness and facing death.

We think to our self-image and making your self-image conscious helps you deal with the challenge of approaching death. A positive self-image can reduce fears and resistance in dying. It helps you to communicate with people without manipulation and fears, which helps you to receive and listen without your mind racing.

The next stage is an extension of dealing with life from the Positive Self’s perspective. This is how you deal with your illness. I wrote a book called A Healthy Way to Be Sick. In this book, you learn how to meet the challenges of dealing with an illness from your Positive Self. Instead of being defeated by your illness, you learn incredible life lessons. Being conscious in this stage can help you to live a quality life as you cope with your illness.

I have had multiple sclerosis since 1981 and though I haven’t healed my condition, I continue to learn lessons that bring me closer to fulfilling my life’s purpose. My illness has been a spiritual journey with creativity, deep love and inner peace. This happens as I deal with partial blindness, an inability to walk and sometimes even to stand. My pain level can reach level of 8 out of 10. I was in Hospice for three months and graduated because my declined slowed down.

As I dealt with my illness, I met a wonderful lady who became my wife. We are both handicapped and experience a true quality of love.  That makes me think that a quality life doesn’t depend on the health of your body, it depends on your consciousness. Now to take that consciousness into the final stage; this is preparing to die.

I wrote books called The End, A Creative Way to Approach Death and A Poetic View of Hospice. I don’t think linear thinking can prepare you as well as being creative. Linear thinking is a left brain function and is often cut off from the rest of your brain. Creativity is a right brain function. It is connected to the right brain and the emotional part of the brain and bodily functions. You need your whole being to approach death, which involves your whole brain.

I chose to use poetry as my creative expression, but any creative approach can work. When I thought of an issue about my death, as I wrote a poem about it, I looked at it from different perspectives. I used imagery to capture my feelings and found associations to say what I meant through mental pictures, instead of logic.

I did the same thing when I was in Hospice. I always thought Hospice was reserved for the final stage of medical care, but poetry changed that for me. Hospice allowed me to take a close look at what I felt about dying. I felt it allowed me the ability to look at my approach, as though the medical profession acknowledged the way I felt. It was like looking at my approach through a microscope to see what I was thinking and feeling about dying. When Hospice ended, I felt being ready to die was feeling comfortable in silence, where I had no questions or comments. I felt complete.

I encourage readers to write your own creative approach to dying. When you do, you will shift from learning about my approach into manifesting your own. Each step in this venture will deepen how you literally feel. Your approach, when conscious, can take you right to the threshold of death. Creativity provides a cushion you can fall back on and an endless process until your last breath.

You can find all of my books on Amazon/Kindle.com.

I Have Found a Healthy Way to be Sick and So Can You

I have had multiple sclerosis since 1981. I am legally blind in a wheel chair with a heart full of love living with a high quality of life. I do not feel it is my intellect that gives me quality; it is the wisdom of my body. My ego may be actively involved, but when it steps aside and allows the Wisdom of my Body to manifest, I find a healthy way to be sick.

I do not feel as though I do health, I receive it with instructions from my body. Hunger tells me how much to eat and sometimes what I am hungry for. In the past, my mind created habits that were not always harmonious with the body’s wisdom. When dealing with healing with sensitivity, old habits can be broken. Just as a person with lung cancer finds the motivation to quit smoking when they are open to inner wisdom, you can find inner wisdom to guide you in what to eat.

When I see a cancer patient smoking, I feel they think the habits in their mind are more important than life itself. When your priority is to be true to inner wisdom, it benefits your health and healing. When thinking is your priority, you are guided by old habits and those may have contributed to your health problems. I am humbled when I respect my inner wisdom and when humbled I am more receptive to the Wisdom of my Body.

The significant people in my life play an important role also. Being loved and loving strengthens the will to live and activates the Wisdom of my Body.  When I was facing a health struggle and being close to death, I felt my connection to my wife strengthen my will to live. Obviously, I did not heal from my MS, but I was more open to the Wisdom of my Body. I was in Hospice for three months, but it took that long to change my priorities.

Two of my books are relevant to this blog; A Healthy Way to be Sick and A Poetic View of Hospice. You will find them at Amazon/Kindle.

For any of my books, a Power summary is available here.

The Patient’s Role in the Hospital

                How we interact with authorities without being a victim is an important lesson we all need to learn. I want to focus on the patient’s role in dealing with the hospital situation. I suggest that the patient strive to be in a super-conscious state of mind. It is difficult for a patient to agree or disagree with a diagnosis, but the patient can be extremely alert when a doctor says what they are going to do.

                One time, I was in a pre-surgery room getting prepped for trigeminal nerve (brain) surgery. I was in intense pain. The doctor was reviewing the surgical procedures before I was anesthetized. When he said the surgery would be on the nerve leading to the right side of my jaw, I immediately was alarmed. This was because the pain and nerve went to the left side of my jaw.  After the doctor checked, he said the right side was what was written on the report. He apologized and operated on the correct side. It showed how important patient participation is.

                It is easy to learn from this example, but no matter what you think the main solution is to be more conscious. In the hospital you become an equal partner with your doctor and in life you partner with authorities. They may know what happens to accomplish a goal, but your role is how conscious you are in what happens to you.

                The hospital is a place where a lot of frustration and anxiety meet professional care. It is a place where an incredible amount of information is passed. If we are not conscious we delegate responsibility to the authorities and act as a victim. Being more conscious not only prevents mistakes, being conscious makes the treatment more effective.  

                I think the main problem in dealing with authorities deals with trust. In health trusting your doctor is very essential to make a strong partnership, but trusting yourself is important also. Trust allows there to be confidence in your feedback. If you don’t trust internally your feedback is wishy-washy and you are not 100% there to participate as a conscious partner in healing. Even on a one dollar bill in America it says “In God we trust”, but for that to happen we need to trust the wisdom that perceives that. In other words we need to trust ourselves to perceive reality consciously. We need that trust to trust the doctor also.

                My personal health struggles were the research I needed to write about health issues. In my book, A Healthy Way to be Sick, I use the 33 years I have had MS to share what I learned along the way. This book can be found on Amazon/Kindle. The power summary is available HERE

From Diagnosis to the End

In the first few minutes after you receive a diagnosis, you set the tone of how you are going to deal with it. This is the way you are going to relate to your illness from that point on, until it is consciously changed. Doctors say that when a person hears a diagnosis of cancer and slams his fist on the desk, he lives longer and becomes more involved than a person who passively accepts it. Our initial reaction to the diagnosis plays a significant role, but it can consciously be changed by developing better life skills. If you trust your inner resources, you become more confident in dealing with challenges. These include self-trust, self-image and confidence.
You trust what is important to you. When you see your inner resources as an important part of your life, you confidently rely on them. When you do not see them as important, you become a passive victim, waiting
for help to come from other than yourself. In my book, A Healthy Way to be Sick, you learn how to move importance from things that are outside of you to what I call the Zero Point, where you trust yourself. Basically, that says that your life and inner wisdom are more important than your thoughts and perceptions. In a health crisis, self-trust is essential to become an
equal partner with your doctor. The doctor represents the medical world and the resources it takes to heal you. In that partnership, you represent the inner world and the inner resources it takes to heal the body and respond to medical treatments.
The next inner resource is developing a strong self-image. We think to our self-image, which is the way we interpret what is happening. A positive self-image interprets challenges in such a way that you play a significant role. Your interpretation determines the conclusion you arrive at. A negative self-image plays the role of a victim and hesitates to get
actively involved.  Since we trust what is important, we have to see our self-image as an important part of the healing process. In my book, The Positive Self: Change Your Self-Image and You Change Your Life, you develop a self-image that serves every part of you. It is your positive self that openly receives powerful inner resources and plays an active role in
healing.
The most important thing you have in healing is the attitude you have about your illness. Attitudes are based on the decisions you made in the past, when you dealt with similar situations. For instance, if in the past when you dealt with a health struggle, you decided that you cannot deal with it, you formed the attitude that eliminated active involvement in the
future. The poor decision came more likely from your negative self. It is possible to image that same situation and create a decision from your positive self, which will significantly change the attitude you have now. If you are more connected to a positive self-image in your everyday life now, that decision naturally changes.                                                                        Confidence is a result of your positive self being kind and compassionate to your negative self. This eliminates the self-doubt that negative conditioning plays in your life. Confidence, or ‘with faith’, brings a spiritual quality to the challenges you face. This quality opens you to something bigger than yourself to deal with your challenge. It eliminates the self-doubt you, too often, insert into challenges. We cannot always change the challenge we face, but we can always change what part of us deals with that challenge. Confidence is an important ingredient in really trusting ourselves.                                              Every part of a health challenge needs to have the best part of you participate. When that happens, you are a better partner with your doctor. This applies, not only to your conscious lifetime, but it also applies to how you face death. This does not only involve you, but also the people you love and those who care for you. Continue reading

The End: A Creative Way To Approach Death

 

To help me prepare for this final journey, I wrote a book called The End: A Creative Approach to Death. The first part of this book helped me be clear about what is involved in approaching death. The second part consists of 40 poems that helped me to prepare from a creative perspective.
Many of us have lived a life where we have become proficient in accomplishing goals; we live our lives in that state of mind. When we are close to the end of life, what is our goal? In our lives, we have been “the Doer,” where we do things by focusing on our thoughts. Preparing for death requires us to also be “the Receiver.”
Of course, there are things to do to prepare for this ultimate journey, but we also have to receive to get valuable input from our deepest inner wisdom. The majority of our character was created by habits developed as children, but most children never learned how to prepare for death.
Consciously approaching death involves utilizing powerful inner resources in a selfless way. This inner journey does not serve your ego, but it definitely brings you closer to life. If preparation can give you a better connection to life, why wait until the end of your life to prepare? It would serve everyone to prepare for death, even when it was not yet a threat. My best preparation happens when I transcend my ego and surrender in consciousness. As Lao Tzu said: “It is best to prepare for death while you are still alive.”
This book also suggests how you can write a book that creatively helps you
to approach death. When you create your thoughts in a book, you create
habits that help you during your toughest struggle, the end of life.

The Beauty of Approaching Death Consciously

Why wait till the end of your life to consciously accept you are going to die? We all will die. Most people have a hard time even thinking about their death, but that is their ego’s resistance. In your most conscious moments, you embrace life instead of your mind-made reality. I have had MS for over 33 years; I am in a wheelchair, legally blind with several handicaps that destroy the quality of my life. I suffer from intense pain. For these reasons, I do not resist death; in fact, at times I would welcome it. You could say this is a terrible situation, but it has given me the opportunity to really study death and the way I approach it

I find that life attachments keep me from going deep inside. They are like a life preserver I subconsciously hold onto. Letting go of them allows me to go deep — to a depth that is beyond thinking — where I connect to the wisdom of my body. Imagine the things we are attached to, such as the clothes we wear. This covering makes us feel secure (if we were naked in the middle of a public event, we would not feel so secure). Think of attachments as the clothes you wear and also the heartfelt joy you feel when getting in bed with your lover naked. Approaching death consciously is removing your attachments as you get closer to death. When you let go of these attachments, you naturally embrace life, like embracing your lover.

To help me prepare for this final journey, I wrote a book called The End: A Creative Approach to Death. The first part of this book helped me be clear about what is involved in approaching death. The second part consists of 40 poems that helped me to prepare from a creative perspective. Here are a few excerpts:

Many of us have lived a life where we have become proficient in accomplishing goals; we live our lives in that state of mind. When we are close to the end of life, what is our goal? In our lives, we have been “the Doer,” where we do things by focusing on our thoughts. Preparing for death requires us to also be “the Receiver.”

Of course, there are things to do to prepare for this ultimate journey, but we also have to receive to get valuable input from our deepest inner wisdom. The majority of our character was created by habits developed as children, but most children never learned how to prepare for death.

Consciously approaching death involves utilizing powerful inner resources in a selfless way. This inner journey does not serve your ego, but it definitely brings you closer to life. If preparation can give you a better connection to life, why wait until the end of your life to prepare? It would serve everyone to prepare for death, even when it was not yet a threat. My best preparation happens when I transcend my ego and surrender in consciousness. As Lao Tzu said: “It is best to prepare for death while you are still alive.”

Basically, we think to our self-image. If you think to your Positive Self, you will get positive responses. If you think to your Negative Self, you will get negative responses. As you read this book, the importance of the Positive Self will become clear, especially in dying, for you want to have positive interpretations at this time.

You will learn how to develop self-trust, which allows you to use inner resources to be in the moment consciously, ready for that passing. You will learn how your breath is a vehicle that can transport consciousness into Silence, which activates the Wisdom of Your Body and creativity as you pass.

Too many people view death as tragic. Their focus is in the rearview mirror as they mourn what they are leaving behind. Of course, mourning is healthy as long as you are aware and conscious of where you are going. This is a natural process. Sometimes when I say I want to die, it leads to mourning and I cry. I welcome emotional release, because I do not want my approach to death to be an intellectual exercise.

Unfortunately, most people resist freedom, as they hold onto what their ego identifies with; there is no freedom in holding on like that. “Confidence” comes from the Latin, “con fide,” or with faith, and it takes confidence to face death without holding onto your mind-made reality. Actually, it takes the same confidence to face death as it does to face life, where you are totally free, connected to life in the moment. It is difficult for the ego to comprehend real freedom, because we are attached to our ego and freedom comes when you are free from all attachments.

In Stillness Speaks, Eckhart Tolle said: “In the last few moments before physical death, and as you die, you then experience yourself as consciousness free of form. Suddenly, there is no more fear, just peace and a knowing that ‘all is well’ and that death is only a form dissolving.” You need to learn how to separate your consciousness from your mind-made reality. From this state of being, you will find passing to be easy and without fear, attachments, or resistance. I think it is good to work toward that as you master approaching death.

I have a formula that I will develop in this book that gives you control over the quality of life as you approach death: Anxiety = approaching death x your resistance. As you approach death, your anxiety increases as your resistance increases. If you learn the art of surrender, your resistance will decrease until you approach death without anxiety.

The Eckhart Tolle quote allows this to happen naturally. As you develop strong habits, you can allow this to happen without creating resistance. The quality of life does not depend on the health of your body; it depends on your focus. In your approach to death, develop the focus that serves you in creating the quality Eckhart Tolle talked about in passing.

When you do this work ahead of time, it also makes it easier for those who love you and care for you. It allows them to relate to you consciously in the moment and say goodbye. There is always mourning when you deal with death, but there can also be a celebration when it is done consciously. Join me in creating the conscious moment, where you pass into a new dimension and celebrate.

Forever

Time seems to be changing for me,

Minutes seem to be so long

And even 10 seconds seem to last forever.

Maybe that is it,

I must be getting closer to forever.

***

Marc Lerner, age 62, has had multiple sclerosis since 1981. A Michigan State graduate in psychology, he worked for 25 years with cancer and AIDS patients, veterans with PTSD  and the mentally ill homeless. In 1982, he founded Life Skills Institute and began writing and giving seminars. His books include A Healthy Way to Be Sick, The Positive Selfand  The End: A Creative Way to Approach Death. All are available on AmazonHis website is lifeskillsinc.com. Marc can be contacted at (734) 913-0868.

Posted on August 28, 2014 and tagged issue 58 marc lerner