Conscious or Conditioned Expectations?

What you expect to find is what you are looking for. We tend to find what we are looking for because that is what is in our mind, even if the alternative is right next to where we are looking. Expectations can be created by habits from the past or with a clear mind having a goal that you want to achieve. Expectations are not bad, but you have to know if they are conscious or not. Expectations based on old memories might not be what is happening right now. When you have a clear mind and a clear goal, expectations can really serve you. For example, say you are working on an experiment. From the past, you expect what previously happened and that can influence what you are looking for.

In communications, you can expect to hear something. Even if the person did not say it, that is the way you hear it. This is the cause of much miscommunication and frustration for both parties. If an expectation grows out of your Conditioned Self, you will rely on old habits to fill in the blanks. This is how we jump to conclusions without really hearing what the other person says. If an expectation comes from your Conscious Self, you will not rely on old habits and you can consciously respond to what is being communicated. The Conscious Self is more open and receptive, while being connected to a deeper wisdom.

For example, you go to the doctor’s office for a pain in your back. This has been a problem for many members of your family, so you expect to hear the same thing as your family’s problem. In fact, the doctor gives a different diagnosis because the x-rays were negative. You have a hard time believing him and feel a subtle resistance to what he suggests. However, when the suggestion works, you find relief. This shows you that your expectations are not always right.

This can happen at work, with intimate communication and the casual communications you have every day. I don’t want to say that all expectations are bad, When your expectations come from the Conscious Self, you  are more aware of what is without having to see it through your old habits. Your Conscious Self is open and does not use past habits to fill in the blanks.


One thought on “Conscious or Conditioned Expectations?

  1. I like this article for several reasons. First, I like the use of “Conscious Self” because it feels synonymous to an enlightened being. Although, an enlightened being feels like an end result and not a work in progress like “Conscious Self.” Plus, the “Conscious Self” seems more fluid and more like a state that can be entered and exited based on our conditioned thinking. Lastly, expectations are something that I’ve struggled with as a recovering codependent. Sometimes, it’s about control for me because I expect things to go a certain way. I realize that “man plans, God laughs” and to take my expectations with a grain of salt. For example, expecting people you haven’t seen in a while to be the same as you remember them. Thank you for your wisdom here.


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